Want to stay connected with grandkids when tech feels overwhelming? You’re not alone. Here’s how to bridge the distance with just a few simple skills – no tech degree required.
The Problem: Technology Has Become the Gatekeeper
A generation ago, staying connected was simpler. You called on the phone. You visited in person. You sent letters or photos in the mail.
Today, connection happens through screens:
- Your daughter sends photos through an app
- Your grandson wants to show you his science project over FaceTime
- Family updates happen in group texts
- Birthday party invitations arrive via email
And if you can’t navigate the technology, you miss out.
It’s not fair. You shouldn’t need a degree in computer science just to see your grandchildren’s faces or share a photo. But that’s where we are.
What’s Really at Stake
This isn’t just about technology. It’s about relationships.
When you can’t figure out how to video call:
- You miss bedtime story requests from your granddaughter
- You can’t see your grandson’s soccer game highlights
- You feel disconnected from their daily lives
When you struggle with texting or photo sharing:
- Your kids start sharing things in the family group chat without including you
- You see photos days or weeks later than everyone else
- You feel like you’re on the outside looking in
The real fear isn’t “I can’t figure out this app.”
The real fear is “I’m being left behind.”
You Shouldn’t Have to Choose
You shouldn’t have to choose between:
- Learning complex technology OR missing your grandkids grow up
- Asking for help constantly OR staying disconnected
- Feeling frustrated and overwhelmed OR giving up entirely
There’s a middle path: Getting just enough help to stay connected, without becoming a tech expert.
What You Actually Need to Stay Connected
Let’s be practical. Here are the specific tech skills that matter most for staying close to your grandkids:
1. Video Calling (FaceTime, Zoom, etc.)
This is the big one. Being able to see their faces, read them a story, watch them show you something they made – this is how you stay present in their lives when you can’t be there in person.
What you need to know:
- How to answer a video call when they call you
- How to start a video call yourself
- How to switch the camera view if needed
That’s it. You don’t need to know all the fancy features. Just the basics to connect.
2. Text Messaging with Photos
Being in the family group chat means you see the daily moments – the funny thing someone said, the photo from the park, the quick updates.
What you need to know:
- How to send a text message
- How to attach a photo to a text
- How to view photos others send you
- How to respond in a group chat (if your family uses them)
3. Email (if your family shares photos or updates that way)
Some families email photo albums or use services like Shutterfly.
What you need to know:
- How to check your email
- How to open attachments
- How to reply
- How to avoid scam emails (so you don’t stress about clicking the wrong thing)
4. Maybe One Photo-Sharing App
If your family uses Google Photos, iCloud, or another app to share albums, you might need to access that.
What you need to know:
- How to open the app
- How to view the shared photos
- That’s genuinely all
You Don’t Need to Know Everything
Here’s what you DON’T need to master:
- Every feature of your phone
- How to troubleshoot complex problems
- The latest apps and trends
- Social media (unless you want to)
You just need to know enough to:
- See your grandkids’ faces
- Share and receive photos
- Send a quick message
- Feel included in the family loop
That’s a very manageable list.
How to Actually Learn This Stuff
The traditional advice is “ask your kids to teach you.” But we both know how that usually goes:
- They show you once, quickly
- You forget a step
- You feel bad asking again
- It gets awkward
Here’s what actually works better:
Practice when you’re NOT trying to connect with someone
Don’t wait until your grandson is calling to figure out FaceTime. Practice beforehand. Call a friend. Call your own voicemail. Get comfortable with the buttons when there’s no pressure.
Write down the steps (in your own words)
When someone shows you how to do something, write it down immediately. Not in their words – in yours. “Big green button at the bottom” is better than “tap the FaceTime icon.”
Ask the same question multiple times without guilt
You will forget. That’s normal. Technology you only use once a week doesn’t stick. You need to ask again, and that’s okay. Find someone (or something) that won’t make you feel bad about it.
Focus on one skill at a time
Don’t try to learn FaceTime AND texting AND email all at once. Pick one. Get comfortable. Then add the next one.
A Story That Might Sound Familiar
Margaret is 73. Her granddaughter Lily is 6 and lives three states away.
Last year, Lily started asking to FaceTime Grandma to show her drawings she made at school. But Margaret couldn’t figure out how to answer the call. By the time her daughter walked her through it over the phone, Lily had lost interest and wandered off.
It happened three times. Margaret felt terrible.
She didn’t want to keep bothering her daughter. But she also didn’t want to miss these moments with Lily.
Here’s what changed:
Margaret got help learning FaceTime at her own pace. She practiced with a friend. She wrote down the steps. She called her daughter just to test it when Lily wasn’t waiting.
Now when Lily calls, Margaret answers on the first try. They “read” books together over video. Lily shows her the loose tooth. Margaret gets to be Grandma, not the person who can’t figure out the phone.
The technology didn’t get easier. Margaret just got the right kind of help.
The Real Goal: Being Present, Not Perfect
You don’t need to be a tech expert.
You need to be able to:
- Answer when they call
- See the photos they share
- Send a quick “I love you” text
- Be included in the moments that matter
That’s it. That’s the goal.
Everything else – the fancy features, the shortcuts, the updates – none of that matters compared to just being connected.
What Your Grandkids Actually Care About
Your grandkids don’t care if you know how to use every feature.
They care that:
- You show up when they want to talk to you
- You see what they’re excited about
- You’re part of their world
- They can reach you
They don’t need you to be good at technology. They need you to be available.
And if learning a few basic tech skills is what it takes to be available – you can do that.
Getting the Help You Need
If you’re reading this and thinking “I want to stay connected, but I don’t know where to start” – start small.
Pick ONE thing you want to be able to do:
- Answer a video call
- Send a photo in a text
- Check email without stress
Then get patient, step-by-step help learning just that one thing.
Tech with Tessa is built for exactly this. Patient guidance for the specific tech skills that help you stay connected to the people you love – without overwhelming you with everything else.
No judgment. No rush. Just clear help at your own pace.
Try Tessa free for 7 days. Learn the tech skills that matter most to you – the ones that keep you close to your grandkids.
Tessa is part of the Smart Buddy Network, which also offers guidance for healthcare and relationships. Learn more